Friday 4 March 2016

Motherhood...the real deal.

I once saw a work colleague who had returned from maternity since I last saw her and asked her how motherhood was. "It's HARD work" she said "I love it, but it's hard work". I was a bit taken aback by this response, wasn't motherhood a joy? Why was she finding it hard? I wondered if there was some hidden circumstance I didn't know about. 
Of course, now I completely understand what she meant, she was simply being honest!! 

As children we play with dolls, presumably because of a subconscious need, even as toddlers to nurture someone smaller and less capable than ourselves. The beauty of this being dolls are silent, don't answer back and definitely sleep through the night! To the casual observer, motherhood can look like dolls play, cuddles and nursing and bottle feeding seem easy if you haven't got a precious bundle of your own. I can't count the sceptical looks I've had when telling tales of martins colic as he was always so calm and settled during the day! 

Yes I adore my child, I love his smiles and giggles and watching him grow. But it all comes as a price. I have to sing three songs to get a smile, tickle just the right spot to make him giggle and all the while washing, cleaning, cooking and trying to keep us all fed and clothed on an incredibly tight budget! There's also nappies to change, I'm vomited on daily, weed on occasionally and now have the joys of having my hair pulled every day! Making bottles is preceded by washing and sterilising, monitoring intake, worrying about said intake. In fact worrying about everything, spending hundreds on potions for wind and cradle cap shampoo and teething remedies. I once spent £11.40 on a colic remedy that we used once and didn't work! 

So it's expensive too, no mother would ever deprive their baby but did Fi-fi Trixabelle really grow up healthier because her parents could afford blankets hand knitted by blind Tibetan nuns? No. There is so substitute for your time affection and attention. Unbelievably there are so many products for sale that actually HARM babies, yet they are readily available for sale! So the amount of research you have to do on these things is unreal (thank god for google). I find myself pouring over constipation advice and baby led weaning tips at 3am when I really should be sleeping! 

It's not a decision to be taken lightly, motherhood is the toughest job you'll ever do, on the lowest pay of your life. 

But unbelievably worth it!! 





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